Secret Name, Secret Identity
Pepe once told me that every Rroma’s real name is a secret. Only the mother knows it. She whispers it into her baby’s ear at the time of birth. The purpose, I was told, is to conceal the baby’s true identity from the evil spirits that may surround her.
Each Rroma is given three names in her lifetime. The first is the Rromani name that is used among Rroma but not in the presence of Gaje. The second name is a Gaje name. It makes business outside of the tribe run a little smoother.
The time between birth and baptism is a very precarious time for the baby as well as for the parents. The baby is often kept in isolation with her mother. Until she is baptized, her name cannot be pronounced. She cannot be photographed and at times her face cannot be uncovered in public.
The mother and father are also at risk of being attacked by the spirits. Due to the mother’s impure condition, she cannot be protected by her husband, only by other women. He too, though, must be careful between sunset and sunrise, at least until the child is baptized.
These beliefs fit well in Mexican culture. Many Mexicans, at least here in Veracruz, talk of el aire, or the wind, which can have a negative effect on the baby or the mother. The baby is always dressed in layers, swaddled and covered with a blanket. The mother, too, is placed in quarentena and discouraged from walking around barefoot, dressing lightly or even getting out of bed.
When my baby was born, I suffered with this. He was born in May, when it was already hot outside. I wanted to open the windows, dress him comfortably in lightweight pajamas and walk around barefoot. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law, though, were quick to warn me of the dangers of el aire.
This may be just one example of why the Rroma have found a home in Mexico. They are able to continue their traditions without people criticizing them too much. In many ways, they’ve found a culture similar to their own.